you have the power to change…
What if I told you that you have the power to change your core identity and create a new version of yourself?
Imagine being the person who no longer feels stuck in the past, the one who sets boundaries and actually respects them, the one that knows what she wants and takes action on it?
Sounds like a dream, right?
You have the power to turn it all into a reality. I know that because it’s what I’m doing too.
To change your life and identity, you need to start by asking yourself:
What is my core identity?
Your core identity is the image and belief you have of yourself. It is a mix of all the beliefs, perceptions, and stories that you have told yourself and have been told to you over the course of your life. Your core identity shapes how you view yourself and interact with the environment around you.
If you want to better understand your identity, look at your environment. Who are you surrounding yourself with? How and where do you spend most of your days? What’s the environment like in your head? What do you believe to be true about yourself?
Whatever you believe to be true and whatever you believe your core identity to be, your brain will reinforce those stories and will do whatever it can to validate the beliefs you tell yourself. It will look for people, opportunities, and environments that align with that identity. Hence the term, “your thoughts become your reality”.
If you are unhappy, it’s because you identify as someone who has an unhappy life. If you keep finding yourself in toxic relationships, it’s because you identify as someone who believes they are unworthy of a healthy love. It’s a HARD pill to swallow, but it’s the truth. It’s easy to blame others and circumstances rather than take accountability, accept it and move forward. I have done that for as long as I can remember. But regardless of what I have been through or what has happened to me, I now understand that It is MY responsibility to create the life I want. I have no power over the past any longer, so why am I allowing myself to be dragged but it?
We do not get what we want in life; we get who we are being.
If you want something different, you have to be someone different. You cannot do the same thing every day, go back to the same toxic cycle and expect there to be a different outcome. It’s time to take radical responsibility for the choices you have made in life and start creating the life you want. Yes, there are certain choices and circumstances in life that are not your fault, but you have the power to take radical action and make new choices starting today. It’s time I start doing the same.
How can you change? How can you harness the power to create a new belief system?
The first step is to identify the differences in your thoughts and your actions between the current version of yourself and the version of yourself you want to be. Are you someone that snoozes your alarm 10 times before you wake up but you want to get up immediately when it goes off? Write that down. Do you want to make your bed every single morning? Write that down. In doing so, you create a visual guide that helps you recognize and work towards bridging the gap between your current habits and your desired identity.
Once you’ve been able to differentiate the two versions of yourself, you have to start believing enough in your vision to ACTUALLY change your actions and thoughts of current you. The best way to do that is to continuously side with future you. This version of you will always choose the hard answer. This version will tell you to get up and go to the gym, to not give into temptation…it will be your internal roadmap to your new core identity.
In this process of transformation, it’s crucial to look at the external influences around you that ultimately shape your self-perception. We are in a time where we can’t deny that social media plays a major role in how we speak to ourselves and what we believe to be true. Social media plays a massive part in our core identity. Only consume content from people that speak to the new version of you, that uplift you, and inspires you. This is also known as intentional consumption.
Similarly, the people and environments you surround yourself with play a pivotal role in your transformation. Surround yourself with people and environments that either reflect where you want to be in life or support this new version of you. Accept and release anything that is telling you that you are not capable of being this new version of yourself. It is normal to outgrow people and relationships during this period because you’re evolving . People come in your life for seasons and it is time to welcome in a brand new season of your life.
Once you’ve figured out who you want to be and what new identity you want to create, you are going to set intentions to embody this future version of yourself every. single. day. And you are going to consciously choose to entertain all evidence that you ARE that person. I find that the best way to do this is to open a new note and title it: “Evidence Portfolio”. In this portfolio you will write down all of things you have either done or thought that support this new version of you.
As you build this portfolio and work towards your new identity, remember that patience and self-compassion are crucial. Healing and growth aren’t linear. You will have tough days and moments when it feels like everything is falling apart. It’s all part of the journey. It’s not about what happens or who hurt you; it’s how you handle it and how quickly you get back on track.
Embrace this journey as an opportunity to create and define your new core identity. With resilience and self-compassion, you are paving the way for a beautiful transformation and feeling of fulfillment. Trust in the process and stay committed to becoming the person you are meant to be. Your new core identity awaits, ready to unfold with every step you take.
